Always work from the primary source
The following is the rather disappointing result of the much anticipated email which I received this morning:
To: My R. Indignation – Applicant Code 12346
This message provides you with your Match result for the APPIC Internship Matching Program for internship positions beginning in 2006.
We regret to inform you that you did not match to a position.
Don’t worry, I did apply with my legal name.
No huge sense of disappointment on my end, and no huge sense of surprise. I’m not being self-deprecating. I applied to very competitive sites with only a moderately competitive resume. Everyone’s confidence and faith have been much appreciated and not incorrectly placed. My sense of relief is at least as large if not larger than my disappointment. I ranked several sites I was not 100% excited about, and now I don’t have to hear my recriminations for sending myself somewhere I may not have ended up enjoying. So, instead, I’ll go to a meeting at 2pm today to hear about Clearinghouse–the process used to match leftover sites with leftover applicants. I’ve never been much for leftovers, so I’m not sure I’ll participate. The process requires rapid decision-making about reviewing and accepting sites. It took me months to choose the sites I applied to, how can I choose another handful in minutes? We’ll see.
I’m more likely to spend the next year on other things. Obtaining employment this summer is number one (and spending the first paycheck I’ve had in 5 years immediately follows as number two). Until then, I’ll probably encase my dissertation materials in a watertight container and have them sunk in the Marianas Trench for a month or two. Is it wrong to take out one’s aggressions on a helpless academic document? I think not.
So go ahead and send your condolences, although I’m not feeling particularly in need of being condoled with. I don’t feel sorry for myself–well, not a lot anyway–and I’m looking forward to the next year perhaps more than I would have if I had matched. –Consider that my first effort at embracing my underacheiving tendencies, and trying not to feel bad for looking forward to getting to take a year off.
February 24th, 2006 at 11:49 am
Hey, I’m amazed you made it this far… I would’ve gone batty long ago!!
I’m not offering condolences, I’m celebrating you not having to accept something you weren’t excited about… your attitude towards all this news is awesome… have a few drinks tonight and celebrate this news and the reilef it brings!
February 24th, 2006 at 12:18 pm
Since condolences will just sound contrived, and since you don’t want them, I will offer you rage instead.
Those idiot retards don’t know what they’re doing. They should go sit on a pointy stick.
February 24th, 2006 at 12:59 pm
Ha ha… “idiot retards”… I’m, sure that’s their professional name! I second what my very smart hubby said… your attitude about this is awesome.. or should I say “grown up?” And yes, throw back a few tonight in celebration of entering the work force.. start planning what your first pay check will bring!
February 24th, 2006 at 2:04 pm
personally, i don’t care much for the unpredictable, but that’s a flaw of mine. unpredictability does give Jesus maybe more to work with than what we plan out for ourselves. so here’s to a great attitude on your part and the good stuff around the corner that we can’t see yet. my first response to the ‘no match’ news was less grown up than yours, i’m afraid– although not quite as passionate as your brother’s. my two words were: “that stinks.” on second thought, let’s just say ”yay, it’s all good,” and see what comes next.